Count Others More Significant Than Yourselves

This week, I received a very sweet email from a young lady in our congregation who said something that absolutely overwhelmed me with joy. Speaking of the family at First Scots, she said, “the way y’all treat the people in that building is probably one of the most heaven-like things I’ve ever seen.” She’s right: in the divisive, selfish world in which we live, a church that treats one another well is a foretaste of heaven. I have read and re-read that email about 50 times this week, every time praising God for His work in this body.

Her words also made me cry out to the Lord again and again because I know how fragile peace within the church can be.  

Why is that?  Why is it that we who have been reconciled to God by the blood of Christ can find it so hard to get along? 

There are many answers to that question, but one is this: We all know how important the church is to the Christian life, so most of us tend to be very passionate about how the church ought to work.  And paradoxically, such passion for the church can at times lead to disagreements that tear apart the church. 

This seems to have been the case of the church at Philippi.  It is safe to say that, of the 14 churches we know that Paul planted, the church at Philippi was nearest to his heart.  The letter was the most personal of all Paul’s letters, and it is brimming with affection for this dear flock.  

But it’s also clear that there were some problems, which seem to stem from two women in the church who could not get along.  Their names were Euodia and Synteche, and their conflict seems to be significant enough that it prompted the writing of this letter.  Paul says to them in Philippians 4:2–3, “I entreat Euodia and I entreat Syntyche to agree in the Lord. Yes, I ask you also, true companion, help these women, who have labored side by side with me in the gospel together with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.” 

Why Can’t We All Just Get Along?

We know very little about the context of their disagreement.  It appears that they are both God-fearing women who have been useful to the Lord in the past.  Paul affirms that their names are written in the book of life, meaning that they are not only members of the church at Philippi, but also the Church Triumphant in Heaven.  

This letter reminds us that godly believers, at times, will disagree.  Paul himself was no stranger to disagreement: In Acts 15:39, we’re told that he and his colaborer Barnabas had a “sharp disagreement” over the role of John Mark as they prepared for the second missionary journey.  As a result, the two of them separated from each other. 

Sometimes disagreements are inevitable, and there may be times in which two sincere believers are at such odds over central issues that the only way forward is to part ways.  

As we consider Euodia and Synteche’s disagreement, it seems that it was not over a matter of doctrine or practice in the church.  If it had been, I think Paul would have addressed that issue.  Paul’s silence about who was right and who was wrong makes me think it is more likely that their disagreement wasn’t about right versus wrong, but rather where most disagreements start: personal preference.  

Matters of personal preference often start small and snowball quickly.  It may be a trivial issue like a disagreement over decor in sanctuary or the color of the carpet in the classrooms.  Before you know it, pride kicks in and the trivial issue creates a massive problem that affects the whole church.

Count One Another More Important than Yourselves

Paul’s counsel for these ladies- and for all of us who ever find ourselves in conflict within the church- is very wise.  Follow the logic of his argument in Philippians 2:

• Verses 1-2: A call to unity:
  • “[1] So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, [2] complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.” 
• Verses 3-4: Consider one another more important than yourselves:
  • “[3] Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. [4] Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” 
• Verses 5-11: Follow Christ’s example of humility: 
  • “[5] Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, [6] who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, [7] but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. [8] And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” 

So, according to the Apostle Paul, what’s the prescription for a bad case of conflict over preferences?  A heaping dose of humility.  It doesn’t matter how theologically trained we are, how gifted we are, or how much experience we have in the church; if we aren’t humble enough to get along well with others, seeking their interests above our own, our gifts are of little use to the church. 

And how do we grow in humility?  Do we decide one day that we’re just going to be humble?  No, humility comes from considering the example of Jesus Christ.  If ever anyone had the right to seek their own preferences and interests above others, it is Jesus.  And yet, at every turn, He humbled Himself by taking on flesh, by acting as a servant, by dying for the sins of His own enemies (Isaiah 53:4-6, Romans 5:10). 

How humbling it is when we realize all that Jesus gladly gave up for us!  As we grow in humility, Christ becomes preeminent in our hearts and lives so that matters of personal preference become less and less consequential to us- and certainly not important enough to cause division in the body of Christ!  After all, one of the six things God hates according to Proverbs 6:16-19 is a person who sows discord among believers. 

Dear brothers and sisters, this isn’t easy.  To our shame, we are often prone to feel that our preferences and desires are more important than others.  We naturally hate to lose in cases of conflict. 

The kind of humility toward one another that life in the church requires is a rare commodity.  Yet it’s not hopeless; Paul’s words in the next section prove this is possible: Philippians 2:12–13 says, “Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.”

Beloved, as we seek to know Jesus Christ more and more, He will produce more and more humility in us, so that seeking the interests of one another will become second nature for all of us as the body of Christ.  And we would do well to love one another well in the church now, since we’ll be together forever with one another in the Church Triumphant in Heaven. 

Perhaps the young lady who wrote me that letter was right: A church that loves Jesus, even with all of its flaws, truly can be one of the most heaven-like things on earth.  I am thankful to be part of this small outpost of Heaven on earth at First Scots!